Comparison of Jane Austen First Act of a Comedy to Jane Austen

ENTER Hostess, Charles, Maria, and Cook.

Hostess to Maria) If the gentry in the Lion should want beds, shew them number 9.

Maria) Yes Mistress. — EXIT Maria

Hostess to Cook) If their Honours in the Moon ask for the bill of fare, give it them.

Cook) I wull, I wull. EXIT Cook.

Hostess to Charles) If their Ladyships in the Sun ring their Bell — answerit.

ENTER Chloe and a chorus of ploughboys. [continues next]

Chloe) Where am I? At Hounslow. — Where go I? To London — . What to do? To be married — . Unto whom? Unto Strephon. Who is he? A Youth. Then I will sing a song.

ENTER Cook — Cook) Here is the bill of fare.

Chloe reads) 2 Ducks, a leg of beef, a stinking partridge, and a tart. — I will have the leg of beef and the partridge. EXIT Cook. And now I will sing another song.

Chorus) Tough one, tough one, tough one For he would carve the partridge if it Should be a tough one. EXIT Chloe and Chorus. — [continues next]

SCENE CHANGES TO THE INSIDE OF THE LION. [continues next]

Enter Strephon and Postilion. Streph:) You drove me from Staines to this place, from whence I mean to go to Town to marry Chloe. How much is your due? [continues next]

[continues previous] SCENE CHANGES TO THE SUN — [continues next]

[continues previous] SCENE CHANGES TO THE INSIDE OF THE LION.

CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe [continues next]

Maria) Yes Mistress. — EXIT Maria [continues next]

Hostess to Cook) If their Honours in the Moon ask for the bill of fare, give it them. [continues next]

Cook) I wull, I wull. EXIT Cook. [continues next]

Hostess to Charles) If their Ladyships in the Sun ring their Bell — answerit. [continues next]

[continues previous] ENTER Chloe and a chorus of ploughboys.

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe [continues next]

[continues previous] Maria) Yes Mistress. — EXIT Maria [continues next]

[continues previous] Hostess to Cook) If their Honours in the Moon ask for the bill of fare, give it them. [continues next]

[continues previous] Hostess to Charles) If their Ladyships in the Sun ring their Bell — answerit. [continues next]

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe [continues next]

ENTER Hostess, Charles, Maria, and Cook. [continues next]

[continues previous] Hostess to Maria) If the gentry in the Lion should want beds, shew them number 9. [continues next]

[continues previous] Cook) I wull, I wull. EXIT Cook. [continues next]

... to herself: it was a scheme, a trick; she was slighted, Maria was preferred; the smile of triumph which Maria was trying to suppress shewed how well it was understood; and before Julia could command herself enough to speak, her brother gave his weight against her too, by saying, "Oh yes! Maria must be Agatha. Maria will be the best Agatha. Though Julia fancies she prefers tragedy, I would not trust her in it. There is nothing of tragedy about her. She has not the look of it. Her features are not tragic features, and she walks too quick, and speaks too quick, and would not ...

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe [continues next]

[continues previous] ENTER Hostess, Charles, Maria, and Cook. [continues next]

[continues previous] Hostess to Maria) If the gentry in the Lion should want beds, shew them number 9. [continues next]

[continues previous] Cook) I wull, I wull. EXIT Cook. [continues next]

[continues previous] Hostess to Charles) If their Ladyships in the Sun ring their Bell — answerit. [continues next]

ENTER Cook — Cook) Here is the bill of fare. [continues next]

"Very well, very well," cried Dr. Grant, "all the better; I am glad to hear you have anything so good in the house. But Miss Price and Mr. Edmund Bertram, I dare say, would take their chance. We none of us want to hear the bill of fare. A friendly meeting, and not a fine dinner, is all we have in view. A turkey, or a goose, or a leg of mutton, or whatever you and your cook chuse to give us."

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe [continues next]

[continues previous] ENTER Hostess, Charles, Maria, and Cook. [continues next]

[continues previous] Maria) Yes Mistress. — EXIT Maria [continues next]

[continues previous] Hostess to Cook) If their Honours in the Moon ask for the bill of fare, give it them. [continues next]

[continues previous] Cook) I wull, I wull. EXIT Cook. [continues next]

[continues previous] ENTER Cook — Cook) Here is the bill of fare.

[continues previous] Chloe reads) 2 Ducks, a leg of beef, a stinking partridge, and a tart. — I will have the leg of beef and the partridge. EXIT Cook. And now I will sing another song.

"I am ready, if the others are."

"Shall I ring the bell?" [continues next]

And the bell was rung, and the carriages spoken for. A few minutes more, and Emma hoped to see one troublesome companion deposited in his own house, to get sober and cool, and the other recover his temper and happiness when this visit of hardship were over. [continues next]

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe

[continues previous] ENTER Hostess, Charles, Maria, and Cook.

[continues previous] Hostess to Maria) If the gentry in the Lion should want beds, shew them number 9.

[continues previous] Hostess to Cook) If their Honours in the Moon ask for the bill of fare, give it them.

[continues previous] "Yes, do."

SCENE CHANGES TO THE SUN —

Chorus) Tough one, tough one, tough one For he would carve the partridge if it Should be a tough one. EXIT Chloe and Chorus. —

SCENE CHANGES TO THE INSIDE OF THE LION.

Enter Strephon and Postilion. Streph:) You drove me from Staines to this place, from whence I mean to go to Town to marry Chloe. How much is your due? [continues next]

"No," replied Anne, "nor next week, nor next, nor next. I assure you that nothing of the sort you are thinking of will be settled any week. I am not going to marry Mr Elliot. I should like to know why you imagine I am?"

... accent so removed from hauteur or disdain of his companions, as convinced her that the improvement of manners which she had yesterday witnessed however temporary its existence might prove, had at least outlived one day. When she saw him thus seeking the acquaintance and courting the good opinion of people with whom any intercourse a few months ago would have been a disgrace — when she saw him thus civil, not only to herself, but to the very relations whom he had openly disdained, and recollected their last lively scene in Hunsford Parsonage — the difference, the change was so great, and struck so forcibly on her mind, ...

SCENE — AN INN [continues next]

SCENE CHANGES TO THE MOON, and discovers Popgun and Pistoletta.

[continues previous] SCENE CHANGES TO THE INSIDE OF THE LION. [continues next]

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe [continues next]

[continues previous] ENTER Hostess, Charles, Maria, and Cook.

[continues previous] Chorus) Tough one, tough one, tough one For he would carve the partridge if it Should be a tough one. EXIT Chloe and Chorus. — [continues next]

[continues previous] Enter Strephon and Postilion. Streph:) You drove me from Staines to this place, from whence I mean to go to Town to marry Chloe. How much is your due?

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe

Chloe reads) 2 Ducks, a leg of beef, a stinking partridge, and a tart. — I will have the leg of beef and the partridge. EXIT Cook. And now I will sing another song. [continues next]

[continues previous] SONG — I am going to have my dinner, After which I shan't be thinner, I wish I had here Strephon For he would carve the partridge if it should be a tough one. [continues next]

[continues previous] Chorus) Tough one, tough one, tough one For he would carve the partridge if it Should be a tough one. EXIT Chloe and Chorus. — [continues next]

... must go: it is a great while since I have seen my father and mother. I am going to send James forward with my hunters immediately; if you have any letter, therefore, he can take it. I shall not be at home myself till Wednesday or Thursday, as I shall go through London, where I have business; but before I leave you," he continued, speaking in a lower tone, and with still greater energy, "I must warn you of one thing — do not let Frederica Vernon be made unhappy by that Martin. He wants to marry her; her mother promotes the match, but she ...

Chorus) Be fun, be fun, be fun, And that to me will be fun. [continues next]

[continues previous] Chloe reads) 2 Ducks, a leg of beef, a stinking partridge, and a tart. — I will have the leg of beef and the partridge. EXIT Cook. And now I will sing another song.

[continues previous] SONG — I am going to have my dinner, After which I shan't be thinner, I wish I had here Strephon For he would carve the partridge if it should be a tough one.

[continues previous] SONG I go to Town And when I come down, I shall be married to Streephon * [*Note the two e's] And that to me will be fun.

[continues previous] Chorus) Be fun, be fun, be fun, And that to me will be fun.

CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe [continues next]

Hostess to Cook) If their Honours in the Moon ask for the bill of fare, give it them. [continues next]

Cook) I wull, I wull. EXIT Cook. [continues next]

"Very well, very well," cried Dr. Grant, "all the better; I am glad to hear you have anything so good in the house. But Miss Price and Mr. Edmund Bertram, I dare say, would take their chance. We none of us want to hear the bill of fare. A friendly meeting, and not a fine dinner, is all we have in view. A turkey, or a goose, or a leg of mutton, or whatever you and your cook chuse to give us."

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe

[continues previous] Cook) I wull, I wull. EXIT Cook.

Chloe) Where am I? At Hounslow. — Where go I? To London — . What to do? To be married — . Unto whom? Unto Strephon. Who is he? A Youth. Then I will sing a song. [continues next]

SONG I go to Town And when I come down, I shall be married to Streephon * [*Note the two e's] And that to me will be fun. [continues next]

Chloe reads) 2 Ducks, a leg of beef, a stinking partridge, and a tart. — I will have the leg of beef and the partridge. EXIT Cook. And now I will sing another song.

"Do you? That's honest, by heavens! I am glad you are no enemy to matrimony, however. Did you ever hear the old song 'Going to One Wedding Brings on Another?' I say, you will come to Belle's wedding, I hope." [continues next]

... obliging of you! No, we should not have heard, if it had not been for this particular circumstance, of her being to come here so soon. My mother is so delighted! — for she is to be three months with us at least. Three months, she says so, positively, as I am going to have the pleasure of reading to you. The case is, you see, that the Campbells are going to Ireland. Mrs. Dixon has persuaded her father and mother to come over and see her directly. They had not intended to go over till the summer, but she is so impatient to see ...

[continues previous] Chloe) Where am I? At Hounslow. — Where go I? To London — . What to do? To be married — . Unto whom? Unto Strephon. Who is he? A Youth. Then I will sing a song. [continues next]

[continues previous] SONG I go to Town And when I come down, I shall be married to Streephon * [*Note the two e's] And that to me will be fun. [continues next]

Chorus) Tough one, tough one, tough one For he would carve the partridge if it Should be a tough one. EXIT Chloe and Chorus. — [continues next]

[continues previous] "Do you? That's honest, by heavens! I am glad you are no enemy to matrimony, however. Did you ever hear the old song 'Going to One Wedding Brings on Another?' I say, you will come to Belle's wedding, I hope."

... Miss de Bourgh, and of her mother Lady Catherine. How wonderfully these sort of things occur! Who would have thought of my meeting with, perhaps, a nephew of Lady Catherine de Bourgh in this assembly! I am most thankful that the discovery is made in time for me to pay my respects to him, which I am now going to do, and trust he will excuse my not having done it before. My total ignorance of the connection must plead my apology."

CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe [continues next]

SCENE CHANGES TO THE MOON, and discovers Popgun and Pistoletta. [continues next]

[continues previous] ENTER Chloe and a chorus of ploughboys. [continues next]

[continues previous] Chloe) Where am I? At Hounslow. — Where go I? To London — . What to do? To be married — . Unto whom? Unto Strephon. Who is he? A Youth. Then I will sing a song.

[continues previous] SONG — I am going to have my dinner, After which I shan't be thinner, I wish I had here Strephon For he would carve the partridge if it should be a tough one.

[continues previous] Chorus) Tough one, tough one, tough one For he would carve the partridge if it Should be a tough one. EXIT Chloe and Chorus. —

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe [continues next]

[continues previous] SCENE — AN INN [continues next]

[continues previous] SCENE CHANGES TO THE MOON, and discovers Popgun and Pistoletta.

[continues previous] SCENE CHANGES TO THE SUN — [continues next]

[continues previous] CHARACTERS Popgun Maria Charles Pistolletta Postilion Hostess Chorus of ploughboys Cook and and Strephon Chloe

[continues previous] Popgun) My Girl, my Darling, my favourite of all my Children, who art the picture of thy poor Mother who died two months ago, with whom I am going to Town to marry to Strephon, and to whom I mean to bequeath my whole Estate, it wants seven Miles.

[continues previous] ENTER Chloe and a chorus of ploughboys.

Post:) Eighteen pence. Streph:) Alas, my freind, I have but a bad guinea with which I mean to support myself in Town. But I will pawn to you an undirected Letter that I received from Chloe. [continues next]

Post:) Sir, I accept your offer. [continues next]

A larger circle of acquaintance, and an increase of amusement, is quite in character with our approaching removal. Yes, I mean to go to as many balls as possible, that I may have a good bargain. Everybody is very much concerned at our going away, and everybody is acquainted with Chawton, and speaks of it as a remarkably pretty village, and everybody knows the house we describe, but nobody fixes on the right.

[continues previous] Enter Strephon and Postilion. Streph:) You drove me from Staines to this place, from whence I mean to go to Town to marry Chloe. How much is your due? [continues next]

[continues previous] Post:) Sir, I accept your offer. [continues next]

Towards the close of the day we received the following Letter from Philippa. [continues next]

... of Mr. Vernon. I might perhaps harden myself in time against the injustice of general reproach, but the loss of HIS valued esteem I am, as you well know, ill-fitted to endure; and when to this may be added the consciousness of having injured you with your family, how am I to support myself? With feelings so poignant as mine, the conviction of having divided the son from his parents would make me, even with you, the most miserable of beings. It will surely, therefore, be advisable to delay our union — to delay it till appearances are more promising — till affairs have taken ...

How impertinent you are to write to me about Tom, as if I had not opportunities of hearing from him myself! The last letter that I received from him was dated on Friday, 8th, and he told me that if the wind should be favorable on Sunday, which it proved to be, they were to sail from Falmouth on that day. By this time, therefore, they are at Barbadoes, I suppose. The Rivers are still at Manydown, and ...

... from Wimpole Street two or three weeks before, on a visit to some relations of Sir Thomas; a removal which her father and mother were now disposed to attribute to some view of convenience on Mr. Yates's account. Very soon after the Rushworths' return to Wimpole Street, Sir Thomas had received a letter from an old and most particular friend in London, who hearing and witnessing a good deal to alarm him in that quarter, wrote to recommend Sir Thomas's coming to London himself, and using his influence with his daughter to put an end to the intimacy which was already exposing her to unpleasant ... [continues next]

... at once bewitches his senses and satisfies his judgment. Oh! Harriet may pick and chuse. Were you, yourself, ever to marry, she is the very woman for you. And is she, at seventeen, just entering into life, just beginning to be known, to be wondered at because she does not accept the first offer she receives? No — pray let her have time to look about her." [continues next]

"As a friend!" — repeated Mr. Knightley. — "Emma, that I fear is a word — No, I have no wish — Stay, yes, why should I hesitate? — I have gone too far already for concealment. — Emma, I accept your offer — Extraordinary as it may seem, I accept it, and refer myself to you as a friend. — Tell me, then, have I no chance of ever succeeding?"

[continues previous] Enter Strephon and Postilion. Streph:) You drove me from Staines to this place, from whence I mean to go to Town to marry Chloe. How much is your due?

[continues previous] Post:) Eighteen pence. Streph:) Alas, my freind, I have but a bad guinea with which I mean to support myself in Town. But I will pawn to you an undirected Letter that I received from Chloe.

[continues previous] "Sir Edward is greatly incensed by your abrupt departure; he has taken back Augusta to Bedfordshire. Much as I wish to enjoy again your charming society, I cannot determine to snatch you from that, of such dear and deserving Freinds — When your Visit to them is terminated, I trust you ...

[continues previous] ... Julia had removed from Wimpole Street two or three weeks before, on a visit to some relations of Sir Thomas; a removal which her father and mother were now disposed to attribute to some view of convenience on Mr. Yates's account. Very soon after the Rushworths' return to Wimpole Street, Sir Thomas had received a letter from an old and most particular friend in London, who hearing and witnessing a good deal to alarm him in that quarter, wrote to recommend Sir Thomas's coming to London himself, and using his influence with his daughter to put an end to the intimacy ...

[continues previous] ... once bewitches his senses and satisfies his judgment. Oh! Harriet may pick and chuse. Were you, yourself, ever to marry, she is the very woman for you. And is she, at seventeen, just entering into life, just beginning to be known, to be wondered at because she does not accept the first offer she receives? No — pray let her have time to look about her."